Physical and Mental Strength: The Power of Exercise in Depression Recovery

The value of exercise is more than skin deep. The relationship between exercise and our mental well-being is not to be underestimated. Yet, exercise is a tool often neglected in mental recovery (Callaghan, 2004) and will be explored in relation to depression.

Depression is characterized by ‘persistent sadness. A loss of interest and pleasure in things’ (WHO), this affects 264 million people globally. Depression is said to result from low levels of a neurotransmitter called ‘serotonin’ (Cowen, 2015). Endorphins, known as the ‘feel good’ hormone, also play a role in our mood. Exercise affects the function of both. Increases in serotonin (Maddock, 2015) and endorphins levels (Saanijoki, 2015) have been demonstrated post exercise. In the study by Saanijoki (2015), self-reported mental state was found to be improved. Guksowska (2004) found that symptoms of depression such as; low self-esteem and social withdrawal were reduced with exercise. This highlights the relationship between physical activity, brain function and our well-being.

In this article I want to explore how we can use exercise as part of mental recovery, and who better to discuss this with than Nathan Barnes. Nathan is an ex-body builder, now personal trainer.

Nathan openly discusses his struggle with depression, and the healthy impact training had on his own mental health.

How old were you when you started training, and why did you start?

Nathan began training at age 17. Aside from vanity reasons, Nathan really experienced a buzz from training. “I was never really sporty. I was never competitive with other people, but I was competitive with myself”.

When did you start to feel depressed? Were there any triggers?

Nathan described his upbringing as “stable” and explains that there was no experience of mental health problems prior to the onset of his depression. After completing his degree in Sports Science with the University of Lancaster, Nathan and a group of close friends embarked on an incredible backpacking experience. It was upon Nathans return that the depression began.

Nathan expressed “I felt like I had no purpose, no idea what I wanted to do with my life when I got home. It was the time of the recession and finding work was difficult… I was totally lost”. A lack of purpose is commonly noted amongst people experiencing depression (LaBier, 2015). Nathan continued, “I thought that I wasn’t good enough and that I was weak… It was like a dark cloud and everything that had once brought me happiness, didn’t anymore”.

What was your initial reaction?

Nathan believed he had to go back to the last place he had felt himself, which was with friends from University.

Friends noticed a difference in Nathan. “People asked me ‘Where’s that Nathan spark gone?’ that really hurt me”. Nathan describes how he initially tried unhealthy coping mechanisms “I turned to drinking because I though it made me more confident and chattier…It almost mimicked what I was like before”. Nathan tried to hide his battle with depression.

Who did you speak to? Were you reluctant to get help?

Nathan’s family were described as supportive, “They wanted to help, but they didn’t know how to”. Nathan contemplated a career with the police, this dissuaded him from going to see a doctor. “I thought that if I saw a doctor and they put me on medication, then that would jeopardize my chances of getting into the police”. Out of this fear, Nathan did not seek medication.

When did you turn to exercise?

Nathan explained that whilst backpacking he “really missed the gym”. However, symptoms of depression can include a loss of appetite and fatigue. Essentially, Nathan didn’t feel able to train. However, amid trying to hide his depression from others, Nathan ended up going back to the gym.

Then something changed, “I felt so much better after training”. Goal setting in training was important, “that sense of achievement, even exceeding my goals gave me that buzz again. It wasn’t me faking that I was OK anymore, I actually became mentally strong again”. Nathan came to the realization he wanted to become a personal trainer, to help others feel the way he was feeling. Nathan also became involved in body building.

Describe bodybuilding and the impact it has on your mental health

Nathan articulates the sense of accomplishment after competing, “It is my sport”. However, there is concern regarding the impact of competing on mental health.

Nathan describes the dieting as “the hardest thing both mentally and physically”. The relationship with food changes. Post competition “there doesn’t seem to be a limit, you just binge”. Nathan notes “I never really understood eating disorders before. After my experience competing, I can definitely see how it happens”. Eating disorders can encompass preoccupation with food, body weight and shape (Mental health information, 2016). Nathan distinguishes clearly that “there is a difference between the healthy relationship with food you build through training, the one I encourage with my clients and the unhealthy relationship you experience in body building”. Nathan urges his clients to ‘budget’ their food rather than demonizing certain foods as ‘bad’.

How does extreme dieting affect you?

When you restrict your intake so extremely, you starve your mind too. This can greatly influence mood “I was impatient and grumpy with my family, I absolutely hated myself for it”. Lack of concentration due to hunger even resulted in Nathan crashing his car. Nathan is thankful he had the support around him during the time, “My wife is so patient and understanding. You need to be with someone who completely gets it. Even my friends understood that for my stag do I wouldn’t be drinking; I was in competition prep”.

A crowd funding page was made to pay for Nathan to compete abroad, “I felt like I would let people down, I couldn’t not go through with it”. Nathan did compete, and has done very well in the competitions, “I would never say never to competing again, you feel such elation knowing what you have managed to achieve”. It comes back to the idea of purpose, “I felt like I had achieved goals every day during competition prep and it felt good”.

When asked how he would feel if he had failed to achieve the daily goals Nathan replied “it would be a very bad day, and it never happened. It was never an option not to achieve that target. I put that first even to the detriment of other things”. Nathan admits he also struggles with body image post competition, as the unsustainable physique slips back “but it’s difficult to watch your body change”.

Do you ever struggle to stay motivated?

Nathan expresses how he finds January a demotivating time of year, “It is the over-indulgence, the lack of structure and getting back into the routine is hard after the holidays. I feel so unhealthy. I almost start to see the signs of depression coming back when I haven’t trained”. It is reassuring to know that even someone of Nathans level in the fitness industry still struggles with motivation. Nathan works closely with his clients both to help them transform their bodies, but also to be a support. “I ask my clients if they would like to declare anything before we begin training, and they do…I think because I can relate to them in a way if they are struggling with their mental health, they can talk to me”.

Are you ever embarrassed to discuss your mental health?

In the UK, male suicide is responsible for 17.2 deaths per 100,000 (National statistics office, 2019). With that, opening a discussion especially for men is important. Nathan expresses “I used to feel stigma from myself and tell myself I was weak. Now I don’t. When I decided to talk about my mental health, I didn’t think about other people reading it or think I was doing anything major. I suppose there is still a “Macho” thing in the back of my head. I do think the fitness industry has started to talk about it more, but it isn’t addressed enough”. It is important to talk, especially with the commonality of depression. Mental illnesses do not discriminate, people from all walks of life can experience these problems. Therefore, it is vital to know that you are not alone.

If you were able to give yourself some advice when you were going through depression, what would you say?

“I would tell myself that it is nothing to feel ashamed about, that I am not weak. I just wish I wasn’t so down on myself”. Nathan describes that his journey taught him a lot, and that he wouldn’t want the life experience he had taken away from him, it has put him on the right path. “everything I went through led me to training, and its why I do what I do”. Exercise for Nathan was all “a part of my healing process”.

The importance of exercise is clearly demonstrated through Nathan’s personal journey as well as scientific research. Physical activity has more of an impact than simply how we look, it effects how we think and how we feel. Having all types of people share their stories and opening the discussion is something that should be encouraged.

Eleanor Daly-Gibbons